Green Chile and Chocolate Cupcakes

This recipe didn't start with green chile - but as a rule of thumb, if you can put green chile in it, then you probably should. The cupcakes hold their own without, chocolatey and fluffy, and there's nothing to be missed from flour. Because who has time for flour.

1/2 cup almond butter
1 garbage banana, mashed
1 egg
1.5 Tbsp maple (or honey, or sugar, or some weird xylitol mixture)
1/4 cup unsweetened cacao powder (see footnote)
2 Tbsp ground flaxseed
1/2 tsp baking soda
1 cup zucchini, shredded
1/2 cup carrots, shredded (excessive vegetable is optional, but makes the muffins go farther)
1 green chile, roasted, peeled, and finely chopped (ya, ya, optional).

Combine, fill a 12 cup muffin pan (they'll be like half height muffins), and bake at 350F for 20 mins.

Footnote: This recipe is just a ploy to eat more chocolate. Cacao powder is so delicious and you can add it to anything.. like your morning oatmeal, or yogurt, or coffee, or just eat it straight out of the bag.  Hell you could put that shit on a celery stick.  I love cacao powder so much I recently bought a 5 lb bag to qualify my 2 dollar amazon purchase for free shipping.  I think I won on that.  They even wrote superfood on the bag so you know it's haaaaalthy.

On another note, I have a similar rule of thumb for kimchi, so these cupcakes might get interesting pretty quickly.

Just Banana Bread

For some reason I absolutely cannot get enough of this recipe. So here it is. Simple is as simple does.

3/4 cup oats
2 bananas
2 eggs
1/4 c almond butter
3 T sugar (wet, dry, stevia, whatever works. maple is awesome and honey makes everything taste like honey)
1 t vanilla
1 t baking powder
1/2 t baking soda
1/2 t cinnamon
1/4 t salt

Food processor - start with just oats until they are floury. Add the rest and blend to a batter.  Pour in a oiled (or lined) loaf pan and bake for 40-45 min at 350F.  You can add some walnuts or chocolate chips for some extra fun.

Calypso Beans (WHY IS THERE FRUIT IN MY FOOD?!)

This list may seem outrageous to you, as it did to me, when this recipe was passed down to me many years ago. So much so that it took me 6 literally years of sitting in my "starred" e-mail box before I gave it a try. Huge oversight. Try it now.

2 red peppers, diced
2 celery sticks, diced
1 red onion, diced
1 banana, chopped
1 mango, diced
3 cloves garlic, minced
1 lb dried calypso beans
1 unloved beer (or stock or bouillon)
3-4 thai chili or red chili
salt and pepper
1 tsp cumin
1 bunch of chopped cilantro
1 can coconut milk

*If you can, soak beans overnight.*

In a stock pot, sauté all the vegetable and fruit things (don’t add coconut milk yet. Drain the hopefully soaking beans and add the beans in water (mix in a beer or add bouillon, etc) to the mixture and simmer for an hour or so, making sure you have a least an inch of liquid over the beans – and you may need to add more water if it gets low.

Add salt and pepper and chili during the hour to taste. When the beans are approaching softish, add the cilantro and coconut milk and simmer for 15 minutes longer.

Hummus: the paste that connects us all.

When the end of times is here - we can all agree on one thing.. hummus is awesome.  Here is a cooked and raw iteration. The best part of these hummus recipes is they are bean free -- i.e. wont give you hummus farts.

Roasted Zucchini Hummus

2 zucchinis, charred, roasted, go ahead and burn it
2 Tbsp tahini
1/4 tsp salt
1 tsp cumin
1/4 tsp paprika
1/4 tsp pepper
juice of 1 lemon
a bit of fresh cilantro
1 tsp olive oil

Throw everything in a food processor except the olive oil. Keep the skin on the zucchini.  Pour blended into a dish then add some additional paprika for color and drizzle a bit of olive oil over the top. SO EXCELLENT.

Raw Sweet Potato Hummus

2 sweet potatoes, peeled and cubed
1 carrot, in a few chunks
1/4 cup cashews (or sub pumpkin seeds or hemp seeds)
2 Tbsp tahini
1 Tbsp apple cider vinegar
2 tsp soy sauce
1/2 tsp cumin
1/4 tsp pepper
juice of 1 lemon

Blend in a food processor or a blender. Taste good?  This is a recreation of a cultured hummus product made locally in Sacramento. It never tastes quite the same. But it also doesn't cost $7.

Shakshuka

This super simple recipe has rocked the house lately. Even if nobody can say it.

1 onion, chopped
1 clove garlic, minced
1 hot pepper, fresh or dried (ancho chiles are great!)
1 jar tomatoes n juices (or three or four fresh tomatoes, tomato paste to sub for volume)
1/2 tsp pepper
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp paprika (smoked preferably)
1 tsp cumin
4 - 6 eggs (or 2 eggs per human being fed)
1/4 cup parsley (or something that looks like it, I've used celery leaves for the parsley effect)
1/2 cup feta cheese

Optional, but really fun adds:
Mushrooms
Kim Chi
Kale


Saute onions and garlic for 5ish minutes. Throw in the peppers, tomatoes, and spices and cook the tomatoes down for 20ish minutes, stirring occasionally.  If you have any fun optionally add them here.

Spoon a few depressions in the tomato mix and crack eggs in the holes.  The eggs will poach themselves after 5ish minutes and turn off the heat when yolks are still running but the whites have turned, well, white.  Throw on the feta and parsley and serve! Can eat with a spoon or over rice or with breadtype things if you so desire.  I'm pretty sure this is a breakfast food but I think it makes a great dinner.